All my significant transitions have happened during or after burnout. In other words, I pushed through until my body and mind couldn’t take it any more.
A wonderful therapist introduced me to the Involvement Continuum which is great for anyone in a caring/helping field, paid or not.
Working on finding a middle in the continuum involves balancing doing (tasks, deadlines, tending to crises), and being (reflecting, resting) to stay productive and maintain well-being.
For me, the ‘high’ associated with doing (identity, contribution, belonging, ‘wins’) means I have to consciously catch myself and make time for being. Daily journaling is the hardest and most effective habit for that.
Exploring the dichotomy of my Doing and Being (and everything in between) has been one of my greatest joys, curiosities and challenges since experiencing my own disorientating dilemmas and leaving my corporate career to start my coaching practice years ago. Thank you for making the link to the developmental line, I’m really interested in how this manifests through the ‘stages’...
One of the reasons why I love Non-Linear Movement practice, is its all ‘being’, there’s no where to go, nothing to achieve. I find that even in my yoga practice I can get caught in ‘doing’ and achieving. My now 7 month puppy has also really brought me to states of ‘being’ and presence, both joyful and exasperation!
Love the link with non-linear movement, Natalie! Such a powerful ‘being’ practice! And coincidentally, we have a 9 month old puppy- and learning the same lesson. As for the developmental line, what I noticed was this evolution from doing a lot (with a peak at Achiever) and then breakdown and Being starting to come more and more into awareness. I don’t think anybody officially considers it a developmental line in the research, but for practical purposes (particularly in coaching) I found it super useful to treat it as such. I discovered that so much perspective-taking comes from those moments of being!
Absolutely, I can relate to the importance of finding balance between "doing" and "being" in our busy lives. For me, a 20-minute daily meditation practice, regular running, and journaling have been my go-to strategies as well. However, I agree that journaling can be the most challenging to maintain as a habit - so any insights on this would be great
Great to hear about your scaffold of practices, Gez! Interestingly, for me journalling was the one (by far the longest) habit I’ve been able to maintain through the years, with no significant gaps since I first started at 16. Thanks for prompting me to reflect more deeply why that was- will strive to unpack it in an upcoming article.
Thank you for bringing another relevant and important topic into this space, Alis. My wakeup call was not a burn out, rather my ‘addiction’ to learning. I became aware of the Doing/Being dichotomy almost 20 years ago through the work of Philippe Rosinski, and his pioneering book ‘Coaching Across Cultures’. Philippe defined Doing as ‘the dominant cultural orientation in mainstream American society’. I agree with you that we can see versions of this obsession with Doing in many places around the world, transcending societies, seeping into organisations, teams, families… . The book continues that Doing ‘demands the kind of activity that is focused on achievements that are measurable by external standards’. Your upbringing resonates with me growing up in a communist country that no longer exists, Yugoslavia, where education and learning were extremely important, as one of the ways (available to most) of getting ahead. This upbringing explains my ‘addiction’ to learning, signing up for courses, buying books that I won’t be able to read in multiple lifetimes, having a disorienting dilemma that it’s never enough. It explains my feeling of guilt for simply sitting and doing nothing. Philippe defined Being as an orientation that ‘values the person, not the achievements. It is inward and introspective, placing greatest emphasis on rewards that are intrinsically meaningful to a person, regardless of how much or how little those rewards conform to the expectations of those around us’. Those few sentences highlight the vertical development at play (expert/achiever; redefining/transforming). What helped me along the way was positioning Being and Doing not as opposites - ‘either or’, rather as complements of each other - ‘and’. Being still doesn’t come naturally to me, but I am much better at it now, and particularly since having granddaughters. They are my guides and anchors in the present moment. I feel sad that I wasn’t able to ‘Be’ more with my daughters, and I am trying to make up for it now. Intentionally doing yoga is another way of injecting Being in my day, and if I don’t have one hour for it, I’ll do 30 or 15 minutes. Reading fiction books, catching up with friends… Off to do some pot-planting now!
That resonates so much, Dina! Love Rosinski’s articulation of the difference between ‘doing’ and ‘being’ - and also your reflection that it’s a ‘yes, and…’, not ‘either-or’. I guess neither of us are in danger of ‘over-being’ for now, so we might as well keep practicing :). I’ve taken your comment as a nudge to kick-start my long-neglected yoga practice again!
All my significant transitions have happened during or after burnout. In other words, I pushed through until my body and mind couldn’t take it any more.
A wonderful therapist introduced me to the Involvement Continuum which is great for anyone in a caring/helping field, paid or not.
https://sifr.foundationhouse.org.au/app/uploads/2020/06/Involvement-continuum.pdf
Working on finding a middle in the continuum involves balancing doing (tasks, deadlines, tending to crises), and being (reflecting, resting) to stay productive and maintain well-being.
For me, the ‘high’ associated with doing (identity, contribution, belonging, ‘wins’) means I have to consciously catch myself and make time for being. Daily journaling is the hardest and most effective habit for that.
Thanks for a wonderful, thought provoking article
Your share resonates so deeply, Janet! I am learning how to find the middle of the continuum every day.
Exploring the dichotomy of my Doing and Being (and everything in between) has been one of my greatest joys, curiosities and challenges since experiencing my own disorientating dilemmas and leaving my corporate career to start my coaching practice years ago. Thank you for making the link to the developmental line, I’m really interested in how this manifests through the ‘stages’...
One of the reasons why I love Non-Linear Movement practice, is its all ‘being’, there’s no where to go, nothing to achieve. I find that even in my yoga practice I can get caught in ‘doing’ and achieving. My now 7 month puppy has also really brought me to states of ‘being’ and presence, both joyful and exasperation!
Love the link with non-linear movement, Natalie! Such a powerful ‘being’ practice! And coincidentally, we have a 9 month old puppy- and learning the same lesson. As for the developmental line, what I noticed was this evolution from doing a lot (with a peak at Achiever) and then breakdown and Being starting to come more and more into awareness. I don’t think anybody officially considers it a developmental line in the research, but for practical purposes (particularly in coaching) I found it super useful to treat it as such. I discovered that so much perspective-taking comes from those moments of being!
Absolutely, I can relate to the importance of finding balance between "doing" and "being" in our busy lives. For me, a 20-minute daily meditation practice, regular running, and journaling have been my go-to strategies as well. However, I agree that journaling can be the most challenging to maintain as a habit - so any insights on this would be great
Great to hear about your scaffold of practices, Gez! Interestingly, for me journalling was the one (by far the longest) habit I’ve been able to maintain through the years, with no significant gaps since I first started at 16. Thanks for prompting me to reflect more deeply why that was- will strive to unpack it in an upcoming article.
Thank you for bringing another relevant and important topic into this space, Alis. My wakeup call was not a burn out, rather my ‘addiction’ to learning. I became aware of the Doing/Being dichotomy almost 20 years ago through the work of Philippe Rosinski, and his pioneering book ‘Coaching Across Cultures’. Philippe defined Doing as ‘the dominant cultural orientation in mainstream American society’. I agree with you that we can see versions of this obsession with Doing in many places around the world, transcending societies, seeping into organisations, teams, families… . The book continues that Doing ‘demands the kind of activity that is focused on achievements that are measurable by external standards’. Your upbringing resonates with me growing up in a communist country that no longer exists, Yugoslavia, where education and learning were extremely important, as one of the ways (available to most) of getting ahead. This upbringing explains my ‘addiction’ to learning, signing up for courses, buying books that I won’t be able to read in multiple lifetimes, having a disorienting dilemma that it’s never enough. It explains my feeling of guilt for simply sitting and doing nothing. Philippe defined Being as an orientation that ‘values the person, not the achievements. It is inward and introspective, placing greatest emphasis on rewards that are intrinsically meaningful to a person, regardless of how much or how little those rewards conform to the expectations of those around us’. Those few sentences highlight the vertical development at play (expert/achiever; redefining/transforming). What helped me along the way was positioning Being and Doing not as opposites - ‘either or’, rather as complements of each other - ‘and’. Being still doesn’t come naturally to me, but I am much better at it now, and particularly since having granddaughters. They are my guides and anchors in the present moment. I feel sad that I wasn’t able to ‘Be’ more with my daughters, and I am trying to make up for it now. Intentionally doing yoga is another way of injecting Being in my day, and if I don’t have one hour for it, I’ll do 30 or 15 minutes. Reading fiction books, catching up with friends… Off to do some pot-planting now!
That resonates so much, Dina! Love Rosinski’s articulation of the difference between ‘doing’ and ‘being’ - and also your reflection that it’s a ‘yes, and…’, not ‘either-or’. I guess neither of us are in danger of ‘over-being’ for now, so we might as well keep practicing :). I’ve taken your comment as a nudge to kick-start my long-neglected yoga practice again!